The Last Few Days In Pictures

Kennedy has been making her bed every morning without even being asked. The doggies are a nice touch. Also, she's kind of an angel. 
I've been designing our closets to make them as organized as possible since we will need every square inch usable when we move in. The colors are proof of how distracted I let myself get during church on Sunday. 
Speaking of needing storage, we'll also be building this bed When everything else is done. 
Cory thinks I'm weird. I always save the red and purple ones for last. 
Brynlie had her first dental checkup and cleaning Monday. She did amazing and actually kind of loved the whole thing. 

She was pretending she was at the beach. 
I've been sweating my heart out at the gym. But since it's hot, I basically sweat my heart out all day long. I'm so over summer temperatures!!! 
Kennedys first sushi experience! Our favorite place changed their menu and got rid of tons of things we loved, so looks like we'll have to go to Happy Sumo from now on. I'm ok with that. 
This made me laugh suuuuuuppppeeerrrr hard. 
Cory and I got to go to the temple last night for the first time in a while. It was perfect. 

Other items of note:

I think we found someone to do our kitchen cabinets! Yay!! And he made some tweaks and suggestions that I am super pumped about! 

I'm struggling getting back into the routine of work, school, gym, house, and mom life. I'll get it eventually, but I've kind of been a beast this week. It's hard going from having ample time to having every second scheduled for hours. 

See you, soon! 


The Great Blister Fest of 2016

What's up guys?! This picture made me bust out laughing because I'm sure it applies to more than one person who reads this: 
But, that's part of the territory of having a public blog I guess. If that's you, judge away! Haha! I got a good kick out of it. 

So... Before we dive into the race recap, let's talk about this little cutie pie and the night we had 
I snapped this picture when we went to check on the girls last night. They were both sound asleep a half hour after we tucked them in. Cory and I were in bed at 9 and amazingly fell asleep super quick...

10:34: I was awakened by screaming and crying coming from the girls room. I waited to see if it had stopped or if I could tell what was going on...
10:35 Kennedy came into our room bawling and said, "Mom! I threw up!" I jumped out of bed and helped her into the bathroom. She had throw up in her hair and on her PJ's. 
10:40-11:00 stripped her puke-covered sheets and stuffed animals, started them in the washing machine, changed her clothes, washed the puke out of her hair, dug out an extra crib mattress, woke up my mom and asked if Kennedy could sleep on her floor since Cory had to leave at 3:30 and I had to leave an hour later for the race, got her a bowl to sleep with in case it happened again, kissed her, left her on the floor feeling like the worst mother ever, and went back to my bed. 
11:00-12:00 laid in bed wide awake and super nauseated. Couldn't tell if it was from being sick also or just from the smell of vomit making things worse 
12:30 got desperate and took some ibuprofen and Tylenol, along with some Tums. 
12:30-1:00 still laid in bed awake...
Somewhere after 1:00 finally fell asleep. 
4:00 alarm went off to get up and get going. 
4:01 seriously considered just not going to the race because I was so dang exhausted. 
4:03 decided to go and got up. 
4:30-5:00 angels guided my drive to the bus pick up because I could barely keep my eyes open! 

So yeah, we had a "fun" night. Thanks to Murphy's Law it had to be the night before a race. Had it been any other night I would have happily slept with Kennedy and helped her, but no! I had to abandon her. I felt awful. My mom said she threw up a couple more times during the night but has been fine all day today. Why is it that kids never start throwing up during the day? It's always at night! 

Anyway, a HUGE thanks to my mom for taking care of her for me. Hopefully she really is done and no one else gets sick. 

So today I ran another race. It was the Run Elevated Half Marathon. I am the most awkward picture taker, ever! 
It was a pretty small race which I liked, and it was super well organized and the race shirts are actually pretty cool. The course was great, overall. There is one short, steep hill they call the "escalator" but other than that there's nothing challenging. 

Since I was so bloody tired I really didn't know what to expect. I started out really well even with hardly any sleep
But about mile 9 I started to get really bad and painful blisters on my feet. I tried to just push through the pain but it became too much and I had to stop and walk a lot the last 3 miles or so. My legs and my lungs were doing just fine but my feet were in so much pain. I've gotten blisters before but nothing like this. I'm not sure what caused it. But I finished with a time of 2:07 which isn't amazing for me, but not terrible either. 
I was pretty surprised by how well I did before the blister fest of '16 because I haven't been running or training, so it was nice to know just my gym stuff is paying off endurance wise. 

After I hobbled to the car I tore my shoes off and couldn't believe what I saw! Warning: these pics are gross. 

The one on my left foot was so massive!!! I had to poke like 20 holes in it to get it to drain, and I'm not even sure I got it all. The one on my right foot had bloody liquid in it which has never happened before. I plastered some Neosporin on them and bandaged them up just so I can walk (and hopefully prevent infection) but I don't know what I'm going to do for church tomorrow. Shoes hurt too bad. 

I'm sooooo ready to be done running for a while. My body can't take it anymore. I still have one more half in two weeks, but 
I'll be taking is VERY easy for that one. Especially if I don't get this blister situation figured out. I need to stop those from happening. Any recommendations for good blister stuff?

I came home to a really grumpy Brynlie but a happy Kennedy. She's feeling better! 
We all had a shower and then literally bummed around all day. It was such a nice day I originally wanted to take them somewhere, but my feet weren't having it and I desperately needed a nap. I literally felt like this 

After I put Brynlie down, Kennedy turned off all the lights for me and shut the blinds so I could sleep while she watched a show. She is the sweetest thing and takes such good care of people. She's going to make a great mother some day. Today she told me she can't die because she wants to grow up and get bigger and have a family some day. I want that for her, too. 

After naps we had a musical afternoon. We listened to a lot of songs, these two being the favorites; they are so good!! 

Then we sang and I downloaded some new sheet music for the piano. I have really neglected my musical talents lately and I need to get back to making them a habit. Especially the piano. I also want music to be a priority for our kids so I need to set a better example. Today was a start so I felt good about it. 

Well Brynlie has already cried twice in the 45 minutes they've been in bed, so I should probably hit the hay early in case crap goes down tonight. If she gets sick I might die. I feel like I have a newborn again! Give. Me. Sleep!!! 

See you, soon! 


It's Finally Friday... Which Means Nothing to Mom's

Much to my major disappointment, last nights amazing dinner ended up giving me severe heartburn and indigestion in the middle of the night last night. I was up from 1-3 am pounding Tums and trying to fall asleep sitting upright... Which didn't end up working. In desperation I took a Motrin PM and finally fell back asleep, but had the hardest time waking up. Weird, right? *sarcasm*

I planned to get up at 6:30 and be showered and ready before the girls emerged from their room with their messy hair and moodiness, but after hitting snooze about a million times I finally rolled out of bed at 7:45... Oops. Sleep paralysis is real, my friends! I even was having a dream that I was riding my bike through the mountains alone and accidentally ran into a whole herd of black bears (you know, since they travel in herds) and they all ended up chasing me and I was peddling my heart out... Even that horrible dream didn't get me out of bed. Did I mention I'm petrified of bears? Cause I am. Especially Grizzlies. But anyway, I digress... 

Once the girls came in and starting crawling on me that was motivation enough to get my sorry behind out of the sheets and into the kitchen so I could at least not have tiny knees and elbows digging into my boobs and vital organs. 

I've subconsciously decided that I'm just going live off protein shakes. I made my usual this morning but added half a cup of strawberries because somehow that made it seem more "breakfasty" and it hardly tasted any different. 
I've ordered some vanilla dairy-free protein powder that I'm planning to use for my morning shakes from now on so that everything isn't chocolate all day long, but it hasn't arrived just yet. Maybe the strawberries with the vanilla powder will rock my world. And maybe it won't. 

This was the first thing I saw on my Instagram this morning. Tell me God doesn't answer prayers. 
Crazy, right? 

We took our time getting ready and then we headed to K's school so she could do her kindergarten testing. Next it was off to Target to get some more of those protein/snack bars, but they haven't restocked yet. I was super sad. However, we did pass by the bar stools and I decided to just "look" for the house. Low and behold, they had EXACTLY what I've been searching for and they were ON SALE!! I felt like it was fate! 
The store only had 1 chair, so I hopped on target.com and ordered 6 of them. We don't have enough room in our house for a dining table and a bar, so we are making our peninsula huge so it can seat 6 and that'll be our main eating area. Even though we're no where near having the kitchen ready for cabinets, we at least will have all our appliances and chairs for when that blessed day comes. And these are faux leather so they'll be cushioned and comfy, but easy to clean. 

We had plans to go to a park dedication with Cory's parents but Brynlie was an extra flavor of grouchy so we opted for a nap instead. Kennedy spent the afternoon trying to be as noisy as humanly possible while I stayed glued to my mug and tried to avoid her. 
I think I'm an extra flavor of grumpy, too, because the noise is making me want to smash something! I am beyond the point of needing a mommy break. For sure. I have mad respect for mothers who's husbands are deployed or gone for months at a time. We get Cory for about 2 hours every day and just the other 22 hours on my own is killing me! I'm a wuss. 

Oh yeah, and I have a race tomorrow... This one will be bitter-sweet because it was the course I planned on getting a PR on when I registered months ago. But that's alright. There will be other races. My only goal for any races the rest of the year is to have fun and get more medals for my collection. That's it. Whatever happens, happens. It'll be fun to see friends from my running group and to run a new course. And get another race shirt that doesn't fit. 

I also spent most of the day stalking the mail man. He is always at our house by 12, sometimes 1. Today he had a package I was super pumped about so of course, he didn't show up until almost 6 pm!!! But, he delivered the happiness in a box. This is sooooo stupid and childish of me, but I got my first pair of Ugg's and have been a major nerd excitedly waiting for them since. 
I have wanted a pair for years and years but I couldn't justify spending so dang much money on boots. Well, my trusty 6pm.com had these on a major sale and I about had a heart attack! I am in love with them! And now I'm 100% ready for fall-- hoodie and leggings weather. Yes!! 

Well, I'd better turn in and try and get some rest for this race. Hopefully I sleep ok to catch up on a crappy night last night. See you, soon!  


It's Really Only Thursday?

Um... Yup.
I woke up this morning from a deep sleep and hit snooze on my alarm. As I laid there I started thinking about the things I needed/wanted to do today and thought, 'I don't feel like doing any of it.' Today was our last official day of no obligations. It was our last chance to be lazy and do nothing. So we did exactly that. And it was awesome! 

The girls woke up and came in bed with me because they were feeling how I was. 
Brynlies sippy cup leaked all over my pillow though, so I was forced to do one load of laundry, but at least it was easy laundry haha! We laid there until after 8 o'clock and talked and looked at stupid things on Pinterest together. Then we moved the all-day-pajama-party to the living room and we basically didn't leave until the afternoon. The girls played, watched kids YouTube, watched yet another installment of Harry Potter, I started reading a book (!! I know! So weird of me!) we had chocolate cake for breakfast (chocolate tuxedo cake from Costco is to die for!! Too bad I'm not supposed to be having it, I almost cried on the last bite) 
And we just sat around being lazy all day. From time to time I would start to feel guilty but then I remembered we won't get to do this anymore very often and the guilt went away. It was so nice to just be. I loved hanging out with my girls and not being distracted or stressed out about anything. 
This is kinda personal (but this is my personal blog) but last night I spent quite a long while pouring out every fear, anxiety, and stress I have to the Lord. I've felt so out of control of life and my emotions so I left nothing to be guessed. I cried like I haven't cried in a looooong time, mostly over Kennedy and school (darn my mommy emotions) and the house. After I sufficiently dehydrated myself and had discussed every problem I desperately need help with, I sat there and felt like a huge load had been lifted. For the first time in a long time, I just felt at peace. My worries shut off for a moment and I truly felt Heavenly Father carrying my burdens for me for a brief time. My anxiety has been through the roof lately and I've felt so unhappy. In that moment I knew everything would eventually be ok. I don't know how, or when, but I'm trying to have faith that it'll all work out and that most importantly, I will receive help and strength along the way, because making it to the "ok" ending is what I'm most worried about. I feel strung so thin I'm worried I'll break before we get there. But, I'm putting my faith to the test and I know Heavenly Father loves me deeply. I felt happier today and I just need to focus on one day at a time. That's my plan for now. 

Ok so fast forward through our lazy day with electronics and no one getting dressed until 3 pm to dinner time... I found a recipe for "melt in your mouth pot roast" and gave it a try. 
Oh. My. Gosh! I literally did melt in your mouth. The meat just fell apart when you touched it and was so full of juice and flavor. I highly recommend it! You can find the recipe here: http://www.joyouslydomestic.com/2014/01/slow-cooker-melt-in-your-mouth-pot-roast.html?m=1
It was really easy, too! 

After Cory got home we went and bought the rest of our appliances because Home Depot was having a sale. I'm really excited for this range! 
Microwave... Not that exciting 
And dishwasher. Which also isn't too exciting unless you haven't had a dishwasher for a year now, like us. Can't wait to use this baby! 
I also happened to pass a tile I fell head over heals for to use in our master bathroom. Don't let anyone tell you love at first sight doesn't exist. 
It's hard to see in the picture but it's the tile that looks like wood and it's gorgeous! 

Well, I'm off to bed for the night. It's amazing how tired I am for having done nothing all day. But tomorrow is a new day. See you, soon! 


First Day of School!

Kindergarten received an adorable redhead today!! 
She woke up super grumpy this morning. She was fighting everything and saying she didn't want to go to school. I finally firmly told her that this was a fun day and she wasn't going to ruin it by being mean. She went to the bathroom and came back and bounded in and exclaimed "Mom! I was right! I am excited for school!" and she was nothing but smiles and giggles since. She's such a cute little goof. I'm so glad she decided to change her attitude. 

Weeks ago I took her to the store to pick out a backpack... I tried every trick I knew to persuade her otherwise, but she settled on this one. Lisa Frank, eat your heart out!! 
She had a great first day and was super happy. I on the other hand, am totally freaking out. She will have homework this year. She gets to do centers. They go to PE and the computer lab and art class... When did she become a real life student?! Plus, she still has some catching up to do and I am panicking about how to get her to work with me. I've tried and tried but she just won't do it! And she will need the extra time this year. So I'm worried. But hopefully with some creativity and some prayer, things will work out one way or another. 

Overall I am really excited for her. And I am super excited to be able to drop her off and pick her up without having to walk her to her classroom haha! They have testing the next couple days so she won't have school again until Monday, but it'll be awesome. I can't wait to see what she will learn this year. 

See you, soon! 



I need to get real here for a moment, before I switch to the random weirdness you've all come to expect from my blog. And I mean real. Like, whiny brat, total meltdown real. So hang on. 

The truth is, I am having a REALLY hard time with this PCOS crap. I literally just can't seem to understand how quickly everything hit me. I look at pictures from 3 months ago and I am dumbfounded at how different my body is. I am really struggling with cutting out dairy (which my doctor did say is a good idea). I'm frustrated that of the 5 pounds I lost, 3 came back. It's been a month and I've lost 2 measly pounds. And it's been HARD to lose that. Is this my life now? Everything being such a huge struggle? Maybe I just need to be more patient and let the medicine level me out a bit more -- she did say it would take a few months. I have just been depressed at how quickly I lost it all when it took years to get to where I was. Running a marathon was doable. It was almost "comfortable", meaning it didn't scare the freaking snot out of me anymore. I enjoyed it! And now... 

I didn't realize how much of my identity and self-confidence was tied up in reaching my physical goals. I don't know if that's unhealthy or not, because it is what I love and what most of my life is about, outside of my kids and family. Having that all taken away crushed me. Yes, I still work out. I still run on occasion. I can still do those things and I won't stop. But doing them with 25 extra pounds is tough. Running hurts in places it never used to. I can't do pull ups anymore. I worked SO HARD to get those!! And while I get this all sound so stupidly superficial, it really is what I love to do. I feel like I've lost a part of me, and it sucks! And the battle to get it back seems impossible to win. 

I'm also completely and totally overwhelmed with our house and my life in general. I don't know how much longer I can handle the stress, the money, the time, the time away from Cory... And I feel like if I get asked "How's the house coming? When do you think you'll move in?" one more time... I might have a nervous breakdown. I get why people ask, and I'd rather they care than not, it's just a reminder that we are basically nowhere closer than we were two months ago; at least that's what it feels like. I'm starting to resent the house and whenever I think about all we have to do still, I start to get a panic attack, like an elephant is sitting on my chest. I just... can't... deal with it anymore... ya know what I mean? I feel like I'm going to just snap any day now... 

I've been struggling with life lately. Hard. That's why my blog has sucked. That's why I haven't talked to people much lately. I'm just overwhelmed and upset and ready to throw in the towel and give up. I don't know how much longer I can handle this crap. Thanks for letting me vent and be candid for a moment. 

So... I'm back on Snapchat again... I deleted it a long time ago and now more than 3 people I know use it, so I decided to give it a go again. It has helped me take more pictures. Even if they are ones like this. 
This adorable sweetheart starts school tomorrow!! Cory gave her a blessing before bed and it helped calm my nerves a bit for the worries I've had for her. I love her so much and I just want what's best for her. 
In the master bedroom of our old house, we had a ceiling fan that had a remote control. It was the greatest thing ever because I could turn on and off the light without getting out of bed (says the girl who just loves being active haha). I was picking up light bulbs at Costco and saw they had these!! They're the same brand as the ones we had at our house and guess what? It comes with a remote!! *epic music* and the price was pretty great, too. I called Cory because they're a temporary item and we decided to pick one up for our future master bedroom. 
The girls were pretending they were camping the other day. I love watching them pretend and get along. 
Brynlie loves the filters on Snapchat. 
This popped up on my Instagram and I almost died from the cuteness. Twins would be terrible but also sooooo cute. 
Kennedy from 3 years ago. 
Now Brynlie is wearing those clothes. Crazy!! 

I also had an embarrassing moment this morning...
That's right in the crotch, ladies and gents. Yup. 

Well, I'd better go for the night. I have some much needed time to spend on my knees. See you, soon! 


Food Stuff, A Ward Campout, and Amazing Conditioner

This may seem pretty obvious, but I sure love these little people. 
Sorry for the picture repeat... 
It's really hitting me that school starts in 3 days and then Kennedy will be gone for a couple hours every day. I'm getting sad! How is she growing up so fast?? Brynlie has either been super hard or super adorable. I mean, she's always that way, but she's been her normal self on steroids. Her personality has been showing more and more and she just makes me laugh! 

This past week I feel like I rocked the no dairy or gluten thing. I was really consistent. But the only problem is it didn't really help my stomach feel any better this time. I'm going to call my doctor tomorrow and ask about dairy being bad for PCOS because that has been the hardest to cut out. Fajitas are disgusting in a corn tortilla (gluten free) without sour cream or cheese. 
If dairy really doesn't make much of a difference then I think I'll keep eating it. I feel like gluten has been fairly easy to cut out so far. My mind will probably change on that the next time I crave pizza, though. 

I did find these bars at Target the other day though and they're really tasty! I wish they had more protein in them but for the times I'm in a pinch and need a snack, they're perfect. 
I also passed the bedding section and fell in love with these colors for the girls room when we move in our house, if they're not married by then. 
I want mint and lavender with pops of orange (coral) and yellow. 
I think it'll be so cute!!! Especially with white furniture. I have no idea what color to paint the walls though... Any suggestions? Our main living space will be a light gray, so I'd like something different in there. Thoughts? Think it over. We have plenty of time, sadly. 

We originally went to Target for a birthday present and more lotion, but like every Target trip, we ended up leaving with a whole lot more. One such thing was this play cleaning set that Kennedy begged and begged me for. I told her I would get it if she used her money for half of it, and a split second later it was in the cart. 
We came home and she instantly went to work cleaning the house for me. I don't think I've ever been happier with a purchase from Target before. It's been awesome! 

Friday night my mom, the girls, and myself headed up to Morgan for our ward campout. I had never been to this place before so I was terribly unprepared for all the fun we could have had, but if we get to go next time, I'll bring way more stuff. Like tubes for the river! 
Th girls had tons of fun anyway wading in the water, playing in the sand (and getting filthy), and swinging on the rope swing with the other kids. And Brynlie even cleaned up after! 
Kennedy, had other plans...
The campout was fun! They had a musical program in the lodge and then an amazing bonfire with all kinds of goodies to roast for s'mores. But we did not anticipate how cold it was going to get and we all FROZE over night. We all hardly got any sleep and we were miserable. I don't think I've ever seen my kids as cranky as they were the following morning. But we still had a good time and I left feeling very blessed and appreciative for being in such a great ward. There are some amazing people here. 

Speaking of amazing... I've never had a truer fortune cookie. Where's my genie with my three wishes to help us finish our house?! 
And for my usual randomness, I saw a girl post about this conditioner on another blog and since my hair sucks, I decided to give it a try, and I LOVE IT!! 
It's pretty expensive (in my opinion) so I only use it once a week to help it last longer. But it makes my hair soooo soft and moisturized. It also makes the bottom of your shower super slippery so be careful... I've had a few moments of near-death where my life has flashed before my eyes So use caution. But it's amazing! 

Well, we have family over now for Sunday dinner so I guess I'd better go pay attention to them. See you, soon!