9.07.2011

The Gain

I mentioned before how pregnancy/motherhood completely changes your perspective on life. It's hard to explain until you really get there. One area I've noticed a big change in is my attitude towards weight gain. In the past year I went from this:
To this:
Then back down to this:
I gained a miserable 50 lbs during pregnancy. I lost 30 of that in the first couple weeks after having Kennedy. I still have about 20 more to go to get down to my pre-pregnancy weight. And although that means a lot of work for me, and it makes me sad that none of my jeans will fit, I don't care nearly a fraction of the amount that I used to. I was cripplingly self conscious about every little flaw on my body, which is ironic when I was in the best shape of my life last year. Maybe it's the fact that there isn't a single part of me that hasn't changed from being pregnant, or the fact that I used to be a giant oompa-loompa, but I have this sudden bout of confidence that I didn't have before. I still want to lose the baby weight, but I'm not freaking out over it or getting depressed. It'll happen when it happens. I'm working hard at it. And I still feel confident with the body I have now. No, it's not ideal, but I think I look pretty good for someone who just had a baby. And every single miserable pregnancy moment and pound gained was worth it. I wouldn't ever trade Kennedy for a "perfect body." I'm very happy about this change in perspective for me. I don't want to live life feeling insecure all the time. And once you come to terms with how destroyed your body really is after childbirth, very little phases you anyway. My ribs and hips expanded, my eye sight is worse, my knees ache from time to time, I have spider veins in my ankle, my feet are longer... etc. But I don't care that much. My life is so much more rewarding and I'm a million times happier having Kennedy than before. I'll keep exercising and working hard to get back in shape and continue being active like I love to be and whatever happens, happens. I'm a much better person as a mother than I am being skinny. I'm grateful for this new attitude.

1 comment:

Amy said...

You do look awesome!