I am so sick of judgmental, competitive, and stupid girls. Why on earth are 90% of us like that? Everywhere I go I see girls sizing up myself and others - picking apart our every flaw and making sure they're better than us. What is the deal? No wonder women are so self conscious. Is your self esteem really based on whether you look better than someone else? Because that is SAD!!
The other night we were at our friends pool. There was some kind of Young Single Adults activity going on there also. There were about 5 of the most annoying girls I have ever met in skimpy bikini's flirting with 2 guys in the hot tub. They were annoying because they were clearly very insecure and trying WAY too hard to get attention. When Cory and I got in the pool, all their eyes were watching me - picking me apart. Then we decided to get in the hot tub despite the hormone fest that was going on in there. Once again, they all watched me get in. Then, the girl with the best body suddenly announces way too loud, "I wanna go back to the gym!" All her friend gave her a look and one girl replied "It's 10:30!" (pm) The good body girl says, while looking at me, "I know, but I LOVE the gym! I would live there if I could." What the heck is that?? Why does she have to try and rub it in that she goes to the gym? Big freaking woop! Then she starts picking her body apart and fishing for compliments so all the other girls would point out that she was basically flawless. I of course was very annoyed, but more than anything, I felt very sorry for her. You'd think she'd be a little more secure and confident than that. She was clearly the best looking one there. And even though she knew that, she wasn't confident enough to just relax and be herself. She had to cram it down people's throats because for some reason, she felt threatened. Maybe she thought Cory as hot ;).
Anyway, I know we all have been envious of other girls for one reason or another. I'm guilty as well. I'd give anything to look like Julianne Hough. But that's never going to happen. I'm not her. I'm me. And I'm never going to be anyone else. I get envious of perfectly skinny girls at the pool, sure. Who doesn't? And although I'd love to look like that, I know it's never going to happen. I just have to do the best with what I've got. That's what my goal has been. I don't need to judge every flaw of every girl I see. Doing so only degrades myself. Putting someone else down has NEVER made someone else feel or look better. I've really been working on loving myself. As many of you know, I've struggled with physical self esteem for quite some time. I discovered a while ago that the biggest contributing factor to that was because I was always comparing myself to others. I hated how I looked because I didn't look like Jessica Biel, Megan Fox, or whoever. I will never be them. I've been working really hard at loving me because that's all I'll ever be. I've made great strides. It's been awesome. I wish all the other insecure girls out there would try the same thing. You don't need to compete with others. You don't need to try and look like someone else. You just need to be you. Because that's all that counts.